The Counter-Offer Phrases I Would Use If Nobody in My Family Had Negotiated Before

Ask for the pay scale, name a number backed by market data, then offer a trade on the rest of the package. The phrase that works best is a calm one: “I am excited about the role, and based on the scale and my experience, I was hoping for X.” Then stop talking and let the employer answer.

I am Mac Malbrough. I hold a J.D. and an MS-HRM, I am not an attorney, and I train people to negotiate. If you are the first in your family in a corporate job, nobody at the dinner table ever showed you how this conversation sounds. These are the words I would use, in the order I would use them.

What do you say when they ask what you are looking for?

Say a range anchored to the market, not to your last paycheck. Labor Code 432.3 bars California employers from relying on your salary history, and it lets an employer ask about your salary expectation. The question is lawful, so have an answer ready.

• “Based on the role and the market, I am looking at a range from X to Y, and I would like to understand where this role sits in your scale.”
• “I would rather focus on what the role is worth than on what I earned before.”

The second phrase is useful when someone asks about your current pay. In California you can decline to give it, and the statute says you can also volunteer it if you choose. I advise not volunteering it. My glossary entry on the salary history ban explains the rule in plain terms.

How do you ask for the pay scale?

Ask directly and early. For employers with 15 or more employees, Labor Code 432.3 requires the posting to include a pay scale and requires the employer to give you the pay scale for the position on reasonable request. If the posting left it out, ask.

• “Could you share the pay scale for this position?”
• “Where in that scale does this offer fall, and what would move it higher?”

The second question is the stronger one. It turns a number into a conversation about criteria, and the criteria tell you what to argue.

What is the first counter, word for word?

Thank them, state your number, give one reason and stop. The structure is short because every extra sentence invites a reply that is not about your number.

• “Thank you for the offer. I am excited about the role. Based on the scale and my experience in X, I was hoping for $Y. Is there flexibility?”
• “I have another process that is moving, and I would love to join you. Could we get to $Y?”

Use the second line only if it is true. A counter works best when your reason is real, and you can attach a market figure, a certification, a scope of work or a competing offer. My guide to salary negotiation for Black candidates covers the extra context that many of us carry into this conversation.

What if they say the base is fixed?

Then you trade, and the rest of the package is where you trade. A total rewards package is more than base pay, and a package trade swaps one part for another when the employer will not move on a single number.

• “I understand the base is set. Could we look at a signing bonus to bridge the gap?”
• “If the base cannot change, could we agree on a salary review at six months?”
• “Could the title reflect the scope, since that is what I will be doing from day one?”
• “Could we add remote days, or a start date that gives me two weeks between jobs?”
• “Could the employer cover the training or certification I would need for this role?”

Choose trades by value to you. A signing bonus helps if you leave money behind at your old job, and a review date helps most if you expect to prove yourself fast. My piece on emotional salary helps you rank what matters, and my guide to comparing two job offers shows how to price a package.

How do you keep the tone warm?

Lead with enthusiasm, and ask, do not demand. Employers hire people they expect to work well with, so the goal is a counter that sounds like a colleague solving a problem. These lines help.

• “I want to make this work.”
• “Help me understand how you got to this number.”
• “What would it take to get closer to $Y?”

First-generation professionals often worry that asking will cost them the job. Most employers expect a counter, and a polite, specific request is a normal part of the process. I cannot promise that for your employer, and a few will react poorly. If a company withdraws an offer because you asked politely, you learned something about how it would treat you for the next five years.

The stakes of the first number are real. The Atlanta Fed Wage Growth Tracker reported median wage growth of 3.4 percent for job stayers and 4.7 percent for job switchers in September 2026, so the starting base shapes what every later raise multiplies. My article on what a first offer costs over 20 years shows the arithmetic.

One more habit helps. After you say your number, stay quiet for a full five seconds. Silence feels long to the person who just asked, and it is usually the other side that speaks next. Write the response down, thank them and ask when you can expect an answer.

What should you do when they say yes, or no?

Get the final terms in writing before you resign from your current job. A yes in a call is not an offer letter. Ask for an updated letter with the base, bonus, title, start date and any agreed review date, and read it before you sign.

If the answer is no, thank them and decide with a clear head. You can accept the original offer, ask for one of the smaller trades, or walk away. A no on one item often leaves room on another, so ask which pieces they can move before you decide.

What should you do this week?

Write your three numbers on one page: the lowest base you would accept, the number you will ask for and the number that would delight you. Add the trades you want in order, and practice the first counter out loud until it takes under 30 seconds.

My salary negotiation script pack has these lines and more for each stage of the process, including email versions. If you want to see what a gap costs over time, try the cost of the first offer calculator before you send the counter.

Before you accept a bonus, read California’s stay-or-pay rules for 2027 and five questions to ask before signing a retention bonus, which turn the new California rules into questions you can ask.

Sources

• Labor Code section 432.3, read October 29, 2026
• Federal Reserve Bank of Atlanta, Wage Growth Tracker, read October 29, 2026

McKinley holds a J.D. but is not a licensed attorney. Articles here are general information, not legal advice. For your specific situation, talk with an employment attorney.